Confession

I have a confession.

Using powertools on my bonsai terrify me.

Serious, hands shaking, put the tool down and walk away, kind of terrified.

I can saw wood (by hand power or tool power), use nail guns with glee, build a deck or entertainment unit from scratch (*insert rude comment about Ikea that I don't really mean*) and dozens of other tool and power tool related things.... but the moment my *trees* are involved, I start to feel a little lightheaded.

And this is, I suspect, holding me back.

I've participated in a demo, going so far as to hold the tree, while someone gleefully hacked away at an innocent hollywood juniper with a dremel..... and to be honest, that may be the problem. The tree.... did not come out lovely, and the guy doing the demo actually gouged his hand badly using his tools. Having to pull out EMT training from five years prior was not my idea of a fun way to end the evening. And the whole thing may have coloured my views on it.

I have at least three trees that I suspect would benefit from some real, heavy duty carving. Two junipers and an azalea. And I just. Can't. Do it.

What I need to do is contemplate getting back in to the local scene and finding someone I trust to show me how to do it *right*. And maybe it is time, almost three years after backing out of it because of internal politics.... will those have gone away? Probably not. Am I more prepared for them? Hardly. But going in knowing what to expect and simply deciding not to play ball? That, maybe, I can do.

Because I want to get my dremel dirty.

The Crazy is Over... or maybe it is just begining

On September 26th, I became Mrs. Pete Coste. It's a very short and simple way of explaining it all, though it may be missing something in the translation. Lemme try that again.

A little over a week and a half ago, I married my highschool sweet heart, exactly 12 years to the day after our first kiss. I try to keep this blog just about the bonsai, but this is such an enormous part of my life (and the planning of said wedding and the ensuing family vacation has taken my attention from my online endeavors), that not sharing it is impossible for me.

But rather than blather on and on, I will keep it simple. I am happy. A pure and heady happiness in a simple joy of knowing that I will be spending the rest of my life with this man. That we'll have the chance to annoy each other for the rest of our lives and terrorizing the grandchildren ;)

As post wedding events are winding down, thank yous are being sent and the house is slowly put back in to order after having several out of town guests, my time is just as slowly becoming my own again. The trees have not suffered, as they were my refuge when things got a little too hectic for me.

Autumn is swinging in, and bonsai life quiets down soon, but there are still things to do once it does. Work on websites and organizing, reading, research and tool cleaning. I am looking forward to being able to relax in to those habits again.

Strange Musings and Today in Bonsai

It's hot. Hideously hot. Hopefully everyone is taking care of themselves as well as their bonsai in this nasty little heat wave we've got going across the USA. The nursery business is finally starting to slow down for us, but with the heat it still *feels* like we've been going full tilt when we get to the end of the day.

I'm sure that I don't need to remind folks who are reading this blog that we need to watch our watering. While not all of our trees may need to be watered two and three times a day, it's worth checking to make sure. I have a few small trees (mame and shohin) that not only need extra watering, but that are kept on trays of wet sand or in the cases of the smallest pots, are covered completely in a tray with sand or fine mulch to help keep the water levels right, because those pots dry out faster than I can sometimes water them, especially on long work days. A shade cloth does wonders, and just about everything *except* for my sun loving conifers (junipers, pines) are protected from the worst of the afternoon summer sun. Issues with water aside, those little pots get *hot*, and even more so the black nursery pots that much of my stock in training lives in.

Of course, my tropicals are thrilled. A few small ficus, fukien, serissa and a rather large scheflerra are all basking in the 90F (30C)temps and 90% humidity. Which is good, they deserve some happy time to. I, however, am not looking forward to the next three weeks of oppressive heat that we on Long Island usually get through August.

Otherwise, work has stopped on the trees. Fertilizing strength and frequency has dropped, and when it resumes, the type and goal will once again have changed (from spring and summer nitrogen growth to higher potash and phosphorus for prepping for autumn and winter). Once the weather cools off, work will recommence, but right now it's mostly focusing on keeping the trees (and myself) cool and watered.

The slowing down of the nursery season and the lack of work to do on the trees should mean that I get more writing done.... if the idea of sitting on my couch with the warm laptop wasn't so abhorrent. Still, there are projects to be done on that front, and deadlines (mostly self imposed) that I've been shirking. I'm several species entries behind both for Kitsune Bonsai (have any requests? Let me know. The order I do them in matters less than getting them done!) and KoB (Ficus wip, just a little bit more to finish. Just do it!), as well as a few other projects for KoB and AoB, one of which is top secret hush hush, if I told you I'd have to kill you.

Well, probably not, but it's funnier that way. At least, it amuses *me*.

Now, an interesting tidbit for today:

I came across a website, with something they call The Bonsai Book of Days. The Phoenix Bonsai Society (http://www.phoenixbonsai.com) has a list of what has happened in bonsai on "this day", going back about a hundred years (maybe more, I haven't read through it all yet).

http://www.phoenixbonsai.com/Days/DaysIndex.html

Checking out for July, I came across an interesting entry that I thought I would share.

July 11th 1981 - "An American Fantasy” was the title of the 5-1/2 foot long Bonkei (tray landscape) created by Mr. Yuji Yoshimura at the International Bonsai Convention in Atlanta today. He was assisted in the demonstration by long-time students Marion Gyllenswan and Phyllis P. Wishnick. The entire 1-1/2 hour program was coordinated by Edwin C. Symmes, Jr. Created by Mr. Yoshimura as a tribute to the country that has supported his efforts in teaching and creating bonsai for over two decades, “An American Fantasy” was comprised of three parts: 1) “The Rugged Mountains,” 2) “The Verdant HilIs,” and 3) The Welcoming Shore.” The landscape depicted a cross section of the American landscape. Starting on the left with the high mountain waterfall as a source -- and planted with dwarf juniper, Sawara cypress, Kingsville dwarf box and azalea -- the water then runs through a rocky mountain gorge. As it enters the second tray, it flows around a hill -- planted with dwarf juniper, serissa, andromeda, cryptomeria, and Trident maple -- and into a pond before continuing out through the flatter landscape. The water continues past a hardwood area with Trident maple in the third tray, into a swampy area with bald cypress and then into the sea. Every aspect of the program was carefully chosen to heighten the dramatic effect. The lighting, music, and drama was effective creating a very dramatic demonstration of the art involved in this creation. Typical of Yoshimura, months were spent preparing the plant material and the entire tray landscape was actually assembled the week before for Symmes to photograph. After the slides were developed the composition was taken apart and replanted in to training containers only to be recreated at the convention. Then immediately following the convention presentation, which was done in the dark with lights only on the plants and no photography permitted to spoil the mood, a complete set of slides was available to memorialize the event.

For a picture of "An American Fantasy" - http://www.phoenixbonsai.com/Days/AmericanFantasy.jpg

I'm interested in several facets of this project. One is how the whole thing was created, in what I can only relate to a test run, *before* the event itself. Is this a common practice for people giving demonstrations? I rarely see saikai done in a demo, but especially if you are bringing your own stock and supplies, doing this makes a lot of sense. How much agony (which I've seen a lot of in demos) would be saved if this was done first? Would it make the demo lose some of its "magic"? I don't think so, but maybe that's just me. And of course this can be applied to more standard one tree demos. How often do the demonstrators request/receive advanced photos of the stock that a club has for them to be working on? This seems like a no brainer to me, and whenever possible, I'd like to know what I'll be working with in advance, give myself some time to look over it (yes, I know, pictures are limited, but limited is better than nothing.). I've only done two demos/workshops, and both of these were for children ( a lot of fun, by the way. They really get in to it, more than some adults I know), but it seems like having a photo in advance of what you'll be working on would be a huge boon.

I also admit to being curious about the make up of the piece. Junipers and serissa? Seems like a couple of the plants in there have vastly different care needs. I can't find any modern references (i.e. anything newer than the blurb about its creation) to the piece, so I wonder how well all parts survived. Which I see as unlikely. But I could be wrong. Part of me would like to be wrong.

I'm going to stop my wonderings here, though this piece may again show up as a topic of conversation. I'd love to hear what you have to say about it.

Just Me and the Trees

That's all it's been. Just me and the trees.

A dire need to step back from certain aspects of the bonsai world as it has become, brought me back to basics. I needed a gentle reminder of the reasons I do this. And there is no gentler reminder than full bonsai benches waiting anxiously for me to pull my attention back from drama and politics and fix my thoughts on the important things.

Just me and the trees.

Several new trees have made their way in to my hands. Alright, so more than a few. Some new pieces of material of species I've worked with previously, including another 50 year old kingsville boxwood from Edna down at Green Gardens that will be a rather unconventional bonsai. Several junipers, including a very large J. chinensis "Blue Point" that has my fiance scratching his head and wondering aloud "how do you make a seven foot tall tree in to a bonsai?" A number of maple seedlings have been pricked out and potted from last year's seeding, not only Japanese Maples, but a number of local species as well(not all of which are destined for bonsai, but also for planting out in conjunction with my son's school next spring). A larger piece of stock, a Sharp's Pygmy Japanese Maple that will be the largest maple stock I've ever worked with, it staring at me through the living room window, bright and green and eager.

There are also a number of species I have not worked with before. Some just because I hadn't purchased them, and some because they aren't at all what most people would consider suitable species for bonsai for one reason or another. A very small cotoneaster found its way to my benches, as well as a Japanese Larch. Of the three that I don't typically see as bonsai, there is a Top Hat blueberry that I have already started work on, and am *very* happy with. I stumbled across a Dwarf Eastern White Pine when I wasn't even in search of stock one day. The needles are smaller than I'd expected, almost as small as the needles on my J. White Pine, and I'll be giving it a shot, though I might need a hand bending some of these branches (which are pretty monstrous) in to position when the time comes. A Heptacodium miconiodides, or a Seven Sons Tree has be wondering mostly invovling if the four inch leaves will reduce at all (if you've ever worked with this species and have any tips, let me know!). The stock itself has beautiful exfoliating bark, great movement, and even if it never makes a "show quality bonsai", I find that I don't really care. Just me and the trees, right?

Several smaller indoor trees followed me home occasionally from a variety of places. I do little work with indoor tropicals. I have very little free space in a very small home, but several changes and the addition of a window sill on a large bay window where none had been previously suddenly made it possible. Serissa, ficus, scheflerra and fukien tea are now settled in different parts of the house (though some have moved outside for the summer, I had very bad luck with my serissas last year and their change from outdoor summer plants to indoor winter plants, so they get to be indoor plants year round now. They are happy enough, I'll leave them alone.).

Just me and the trees.

So where does this leave the society, bonsai blog and the rest of the internet aspects that I had been participating in?

Honestly, I'm not sure yet. There are some things I miss doing, and some places I miss being. And most of all, there are some people I miss being able to talk to on a regular basis. I needed a hiatus from all of it, time to recenter and refocus on what was important and what wasn't. It isn't necessary to point fingers and proclaim nonsense, and I'm not going to do so. Additional drama is never a good thing, and I've made myself a promise of not getting sucked back in to the parts that drive me nuts and just do what's important.

So, what's important then? The people, mostly. The sense of community with folks who have similar interests and a drive to share. Not just sharing their knowledge, but also their time and their friendship. I do miss being able to have people I trust to ask a question to. I miss working on the species sheets at KoB, and shuffling photos together for galleries at AoB. I miss working on my own Kitsune Bonsai project, as well as using this blog to share what I am working on and to organize my thoughts.

It's amazing how making a mental list of the things you enjoy against a list of the things that drive you nuts can focus you down to what is worth doing. It's so simple. And it has removed a lot of things now that I'm just not interested in wasting my time on, because they bring more grief than peace. There's enough grief in any life without inviting more in.

Just you and me and all of the trees.

I'll be spending the next week or so puttering around, mostly with my trees when the sun is shining (it's been raining for weeks here), but also starting to get back involved where I can, and where the door is still open.

-Heather

What a long, strange road we walk

Health problems. New jobs. Summer vacation for the kiddies. Computer getting the binary version of the clap. Frustration with politics, both in the national sense and in the internet sense. Moving. Home ownership. Historical epiphanies.

What do all of these things have in common?

They've brought about the neglect of my bonsai. Both in physical and digital format.

The last months have been a rollercoaster ride. And my hobbies are always the first to suffer when things go crazy. Not only my online bonsai participation dropping to level zero, but even my trees themselves suffered neglect this summer. While I only lost three trees (two due to watering mishaps involving a relative and vacation time, and one for unknown, boggling reasons. I will miss that mugo pine.), what I truly lost was a season worth of work. Fortunately, in a life long hobby, a single season seems small in the scheme of sixty years or more if I'm lucky (or unlucky, depending on your point of view).

While I know that on a logical level, it sometimes feels like a physical blow when I look at my benches, and realize that I have acomplished *nothing* this year, other than the basic task of keeping these small reflections of myself alive with the bare minimum of care. Which oddly enough, reflects the effort I've put in to myself as well since April.

Winter, as always, is a quiet time for bonsai, though I have much to do still before cold weather hits here. While repottings, trimings, wirings and a number of other verbs ending in -ing will have to wait, there are still things that I can do with certain trees, and preperations to begin for winter care and protection, now that the backyard is of a significantly (read: less protected) different quality.

Where does this leave me? With the nursery season tapering off, my time (and hopefully energy) will be rising again. And especially once the cold of winter hits, with less to do tree wise, my time will again turn to books and the computer. I hope this winter to come closer to completing the Kitsune Bonsai project, get back involved on the forums, and generally set myself to remembering just who I am outside of everything but my own mind.

As the crazy fades away, I get a chance to remember that it is not a defining part of life. Merely a symptom of it.

Forget the Robin....

Haven't seen a robin yet, but for the first time this season, the call of the Redwing Blackbird sliced out over my front lawn this morning as I saw my son off to school. Though the robin is the herald of spring, I have to admit that the return of the Redwing Blackbird is a much more important sign for me. Why's that?

Repotting time.

It's not fool proof, and sometimes the birds get a tad confused and get themselves caught in a late freeze (though for them it's less of an issue than the neo-tropical birds that migrate based on day length, rather than current climate conditions). But typically, within about a week, two tops of the arrvial of these birds, I'm comfortable starting my repotting. Odd way to gauge it? Perhaps.

So what am I waiting for? Beside the slew of bad weather we're slated for this weekened (rain, rain and more rain), the new set of soil sieves I ordered has not yet arrived. I'm not a frequent e-bay customer, it has never really appealed to me, and the tardiness of the delivery isn't making me more of a fan, I have to admit. I've had good luck with Dallas Bonsai for items like this in the past, and I'll order from them again next time, or for that matter, this time if I can find a way to just cancel the order at this point.

Soil ingredients are most ready. The fir bark hasn't come in yet at a regular local nursery, but everything else ready and waiting. I use some combination, depending on the tree, of turface, pea gravel, lava rocks, and pine or fir bark. I'd tried to Oil-dri after a recommendation, but frankly, am less than thrilled with the results. It broke down far more than I'd expected in the few pots I'd used it in, and those test trees are the first things to be getting a repot this year. Root growth on them seems to have been negligible at best, completely static on one. There's been no obvious *harm* done to the trees, but I don't see that a few years in that medium would do anything good for the tree's health. Still trying to find a new local source for sphagnum moss, with Golden Bonsai not in business at the moment, and if I have to I'll order some online as well. I'm constantly surprised by what my local nurseries do and do not carry. Sphagnum moss seems like a basic nursery product to me, considering it's varied uses, but I guess that's just me. I'll be starting several projects that involve the first steps in fixing some poor nebari on at least two trees, and I'd been hoping to start an airlayer on a crab apple out in the yard. We'll see what happens.

All in all, today's a beautiful day. I'd intended on finishing up the species sheets for at least the Olive for KoB, but it might be a day to head down to the Bayard Cutting Arboretem, at least while I've got the sun.

So, where's my spring?

For a week or so there, I thought we had it. Temps in the 40s and 50s, sunny days with a day or rain or two. Pleanstly warmer breezes and something fresh coming off the bay.

Then a couple days ago we dropped into a sudden freeze. With temps in the teens for two days, followed by snow and again by barely melting rain, I'm getting a little miffed. I realize it's not suposed to be warm weather yet, but that doesn't mean I appreciate someone teasing me with it!

I'm ready to start repotting, but the weather, she is not so prepared. I'm not trusting things just yet to keep from freezing on me again. I'll content myself with prowling impatiently around my benches.